My newborn cries for hours in the evening and nothing helps. Is that normal?
Yes, and it's one of the hardest normal things there is. Evening crying peaks around six weeks and usually eases by three to four months. You're not failing. Your baby is just very new.
What's behind it
It's 6 pm. You've fed, changed, rocked, sung, walked, started again. The crying goes on. Nothing is wrong with your baby, and nothing is wrong with you. Many healthy newborns have a stretch of hard crying in the evening, often the same time each day. Doctors call it colic and still don't fully know why. The best guess: a tiny nervous system that has had a whole day of world and can't switch off.
The pattern is what makes it normal. It builds in the first weeks, peaks around six weeks, and fades by three or four months. Between episodes the baby feeds, sleeps and gains weight. If that's your baby, this is a phase, not a problem.
What sometimes helps: a dim, quiet room. Skin to skin. A snug wrap. Steady movement, a walk outside, white noise, the vacuum cleaner. Try one thing for a few minutes rather than ten in a row. And know that sometimes nothing helps, and holding a crying baby calmly is still the right thing to do.
What it is not: your fault, your milk, your technique. The most important task in these weeks is keeping the adult okay. Take turns. Put the baby down safely and step out for a minute if you need to. Never shake a baby.
Try this week
- Note the start and end time of the crying for three evenings; a pattern is oddly comforting and useful for the doctor.
- Agree with your partner or a friend who takes the baby for thirty minutes at the worst time, and leave the flat.
- Pick one calming thing, like a wrap and a walk, and do only that for ten minutes before trying anything else.
When to get help
Call your pediatrician or midwife promptly if your baby has a fever (especially under three months), vomits forcefully or vomits green, feeds poorly, has fewer wet diapers, seems unusually floppy, sleepy or hard to wake, has a high-pitched or very different cry, or if crying started suddenly. Also call for help if you feel you might lose control.
In the app for this
- Free · PlusMila at 3 am: ask whether it's normal, she knows your child's age and says plainly when it's time for the pediatrician.
- Free · PlusPractices for the early years: «A bedtime without rushing», «Three small moments a day», «The five-minute warning».
- FreeA baby on the way? The Parents School: nine months, 27 lessons, month 1 free.
Free is free for good. Plus opens the whole map, all cards, games and practices.
Mila knows these answers, and your kids
The free family check takes five minutes. After that, Mila answers with your children's names and ages in mind, and the map gives you one thing to try this week.
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